🎉 Three Lessons from Three Years of Writing
Letter 152: Writing reflections, Matt Corby, Biking
If you are new here or missed last week's edition, you can catch up on the past letters here. If you are reading this for the first time, I’d love you to sign up below to join the other 556 learn-it-alls:
Aloha fellow learn-it-all 👋
Greetings from a gloomy Honolulu, Hawaii ☁️
Wahoo it’s the end of quarter 1! I’ve still got a lot of reflection to sit in on what the heck happened these past three months. I’m a huge advocate for celebrating the wins in your life. When you notice them you are that much closer to achieving them again.
Now, let’s dive into letter 152 from a learn-it-all. Enjoy!
❓Question to think about
What lessons have I learned from these past three years of writing?
🖊️ Writing
Three years ago I sent out my first letter from a learn-it-all.
When I first came up with this intention of weekly publishing, it felt too vague but making it any more specific seemed claustrophobic. Surprisingly, I have remained true to this original intention. These letters are personal reflections from my life so I knew I’d jeopardize my integrity if I promised anything too specific. I live a dynamic and adventurous life with seemingly random things and the title of the newsletter implies that.
Honestly, I am in utter disbelief that I’ve made it this far. Sure if I actually did share every week for those three years I’d be at letter 156 right now instead of 152. Four missed weeks out of 156, that’ll do. I am proud of myself.
Three lessons that have kept me consistent over the last three years
Lesson 1: Write something every day.
“I don't think you have time to waste not writing because you are afraid you won't be good at it.” - Anne Lamott, Bird By Bird
During the pandemic, I had nothing but time to write. I was laid off and felt like a depressed and antisocial victim. Through the daily journaling practice I started in April of 2019, I began to use it as a tool to reflect on what I could change in my life. Through this, I found my writing practice. (Oh and I also became a running lunatic.)
When the world started opening up more, I remember my mentor calling me and advising me that a weekly cadence is too much to keep up with. My fear agreed. But then my head and my heart and my gut all rebelled against that.
Was I really going to back down from this? I enjoyed the process and how accomplished it made me feel each week for shooting my shot showing up on the Internet and sharing something uniquely my own that only I can share. To admit defeat by throwing my hands up that I don’t have the time is a fool’s game. It’s actually that I wasn’t willing to make the time for it.
As the iterations of letters went on, I found that my writing didn’t have to take that long after all. Through this remote team, I was ghostwriting podcasts for, I realized that the creative process could be reverse-engineered in a way that wasn’t a timely burden. I could find ways to use what I was already learning in life to be content I’d share.
I could collect ambient research from the conversations I was already having and what I was already consuming so my publishing served as a forcing function that helped reinforce and crystallize what I already knew. It was a win-win because I wanted to reflect on these parts of my life regardless.
When I decided I wanted to become a writer and dedicate myself to my writing practice, I not only wrote every day but also published a ‘ship it’ for 100 days straight! All those days added up to 100,000 published words under my name in 2020. Though, I knew those early mornings and late nights weren’t sustainable for the long term.
So first things first, write something every day. It could be a line or a note or a text to yourself. Getting scientific for a sentence, Issac Newton's first law of motion explains inertia and how an object remains at rest unless in it is moving it will continue to move.
Simply get in the habit of capturing writing ideas and everything in life becomes an inspiration to write. It’s similar to having an overflowing wardrobe of clean clothes, it forces you to want to wear your best outfits to show off. Go be a peacock and flaunt your favorite creations.
When the inspiration and overflow of ideas are pouring out of you, it feels silly not to share something.
Lesson 2: People are reading YOUR writing.
“To be yourself in a world that is constantly trying to make you something else is the greatest accomplishment.” - Ralph Waldo Emerson
Don’t shy away from the spotlight. Share your unique perspective. Everyone has the power to create a sliver of change that we want to see in the world.
Some of my most fulfilled days were the days when readers told me that they tried out monogamous book reading, meditation, journaling, or going out without drinking for the first time.
The saying goes that actions speak louder than words, but sometimes words are what prompt that action to take place in the first place. Never underappreciate the power of the words that you write.
Be gross and share the silly story about vomiting over the lifelines of a sailboat. Be vulnerable and share about the weird feelings with time anxiety. Be quirky and share about the breakup with your best friend (a journal).
Sure there’s that AI technology coming out with Chat GPT but that tool is *not* human. People connect best with people. So, show your flaws and imperfections and give people a peak behind the curtain sometimes because that’s what lets people find belonging since perfection doesn’t exist in this life. The 13th-century poet Rumi puts reminds us, “If you are looking for a friend who is faultless, you will be friendless.”
Life ticks by swiftly. As the days pass, the numerator on the fraction of life stays the same while the denominator of each year only gets bigger. This means that as time goes on each fraction of time is smaller. As Ferris Bueller says, “Life moves pretty fast. If you don't stop and look around once in a while, you could miss it.” Your future self will thank you for capturing the thoughts and feelings and experiences that you are living today.
The present moment is only as true as it is right now. After all, you are the expert in your own life experiences, and no one can take those away from you.
Last but definitely most important…
Lesson 3: Follow the FUN!
“Creativity is intelligence having fun.” -Albert Einstein
I failed my first-ever writing project after raising over $4000 in funding to publish a book, and I took myself way too seriously. I wrote daily affirmations of being a book author and even would give people business cards that reflected it too.
With my newsletter, I feared that something similar would happen again. This has been an outlet for me to work with the twists and turns of life and to still show up and share something. The flexibility of my letters has allowed me to be inventive.
My weekly publishing cadence and practice are a testament to the person I want my future self to be: someone who shows up, authentically shares, and trusts in the path even though it’s undoubtedly winding without a destination in sight.
I started writing to explore what I was curious about and wanted to find out, but also to crystallize what I already knew. It’s like self-directed research projects. No one is putting a gun up to your head. This isn’t a do-or-die.
Zoom out and realize that in the grand scheme of life, this writing and publishing practice will not be the end-all of what your life amounts to. It is merely a mirror that reflects a snippet of your life. Readers can tell when this feels coerced, so if writing feels like you’re gritting your teeth doing taxes, then it’s time to take it easy and keep things lighter by finding something else to write about.
For me challenging, myself to explore new domains of my life is fun, but sometimes I recognize that I need to slow down and write something that feels safer and simpler to share. I’ve been trying to find the sweet spot between contentedness and challenge. Not every piece needs to create a vulnerability hangover. Writing regularly is hard enough as it is. Move back and forth between shorter easier microwave pieces and those longer exploratory meandering crockpot pieces.
All in all, this weekly writing and publishing cadence is one of the few things I can count on for my consistent creative expression. It affirms who I believe I am as a creative writer. I don’t see an end in sight to the winding road of these letters but I don’t want to ever.
Three years of weekly writing is one of the proudest things I have accomplished in my lifetime. I cannot wait to keep going.
🔍 Word to define
Writing: To frame or combine ideas, and express them in written words; to play the author; to recite or relate in books; to compose.
🌟 Quotes to inspire
"Everyone writes in a way; that is, each person has a "story," a personal narrative which is constantly being replayed, revised, taken apart, and put together again. The significant points in this narrative change as a person ages—what may have been tragedy at twenty is seen as comedy or nostalgia at forty. All children write. (And paint, and sing.) I suppose the real question is why do so many people give it up?"
- Margaret Atwood
“You own everything that happened to you. Tell your stories. If people wanted you to write warmly about them, they should have behaved better.”
- Anne Lamott, Bird by Bird
🎧 Listening
I complicate the feeling
We don't believe the same thing
I know you know we don't give in
You under rate the small things
We fail to heed the warning
I know you know we don't give inWind me up til I'm reeling
Tone it down
Slow the feeling
Settle in for the healing
How far is too far?
I recently discovered Matt Corby since he is a favorite artist of both my roommate and sister. Corby is an Australian singer-songwriter who just dropped his latest album that I’ve been listening to on repeat.
Spotify describes the album as “a sonically adventurous rumination on all of life’s stuff…. a body of work that glides even deeper into Corby’s RnB roots, while embracing aspects of vintage fun, hip-hop and playful soft rock motifs.” Wowzer, I couldn’t have put it better myself.
More specifically this song Reelin’ has found resonance in relation to my relationship with my writing practice:
Sometimes the attachment of a relationship is worth the compromises even if the attraction is fleeting. That doesn’t make it any less complicated though.
📸 Photo of the Week
Considering my throbbing shin splints and itchy ear infection, I haven’t been able to run or swim for the past week or so. Staying away from the ocean and saying ‘no’ to prime south shore swell has been such a struggle.
Given those constraints, I’ve tossed my Honolulu triathlon training plan to the side and decided similar to my first triathlon: I am prioritizing whatever will make me fit.
What this meant for me the past week was biking ~60 miles. Biking so many different distances and elevations have been fun and it all reminds me of my 22year old dream I had of living in Amsterdam again.
🙏 Shoutouts
To my new friend George, I met at a picnic yesterday who got me crying as he reminded of my grandpa and who passed on April 1st. I’m going to write a story about this interaction
To Allie Crawford,
, and Nicolas Forero for editing my three lessons piece of writingTo fellow reader Cassidy and new biking companion for coaching me up the steepest bike ride of Sierra Drive that I’ve ever taken
To Sarah Melody Vinci for their leadership in corralling together a Zoom reunion to redirect the ‘mastermind’ group intentions and expectations
I appreciate you reading this!
If ideas resonated, I’d love you to leave a comment, reply to this email, or send me a message on Twitter @JenVermet. If you forgot who I am, I welcome you to my online home.
Never stop learning 😁
Mahalo 🌺
Jen
PS - if you like this, you’d also enjoy checking out 15 Lessons from 100 Weeks of Writing Online
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👣Footnotes
On Rhythm, Rhyme Repeat takeaways:
On my life resume that I resurfaced from 2019:
On celebrating the first quarter:
On nicknames:
On making new friends:
Jen, I've been meaning to comment on this amazing reflection. So many golden nuggets, and your consistency is amazing (you've missed on average ONLY 1 week in an entire freaking year. Nuts.)
Thank you for sharing your wisdom with us. It's truly inspiring.