The month I almost skipped

And why I didn’t

Hallo fellow learn-it-all 👋

Greetings from Grosse Pointe, Michigan

I’m sitting at the gas-powered fireplace where I used to lie for hours each night during my childhood, neatly putting little numbers into squares on graph paper and then begrudgingly highlighting years and historical figures’ names in my spiral-bound five-star notebook

I just bathed two golden doodles in the shower. I hung up my professional pet-sitting career a month ago, but I’m back at it for the fam. Mom just made me a double espresso latte. I’m wired and doing a sprint to get this out so I can have a playdate with my dad at the Edsel Ford House. He’s back from Costco now so I’ve stopped editing it.

A brief detour from monthly recap thoughts: from October 2024 to October 2025, I was using a Supernote Nomad e-journal (referred to by Edward ), and after that year-long minimalistic experiment where I never reread my entries, I’ve gone back to analog. The old-school way with a notebook, even if it means more physical things. Now I can reread it and enjoy it more. But that takes sometime.

So here we are. I do these recaps every month, and they’ve become a cage of my own creation.

When something starts as a ritual and then slides into a routine, on an off-day, it can turn into a chore. An obligation you forgot why the heck your past self signed up for.

Monotony is so boring. Eight years ago I was working in risk management at an insurance company in Detroit and at the end of the month my manager would present the risk report I made, and then after it he’d say, “time to start the next one.” I wanted to press the ‘escape’ key on my reality. That’s it??

I recently read from the Indian-born American entrepreneur Naval Ravikant that “The most alive people aren’t the most spontaneous or the most disciplined, they’re the ones who’ve made discipline a second skin, so they can live in flow without falling apart.” Life is about living a disciplined life, spontaneously.

But then I think about how interesting life has been to me, and I still want to share something.

Also, I’ve been feeling stuck partly because four readers left. I know I shouldn’t check this. BUT suddenly I felt the pressure to write something that “pleases” people so more people don’t leave. But the truth is: these recaps are for me. I’m the only one who will reread them years from now. I see these digital postcards as milk with an expiration date, and I’m the one drinking this expired milk, so it may as well be my favorite flavor. It’s going to be chocolate, instead of vanilla.

Some folks encouraged me to spice up the format or skip it if it feels stale. But when I imagined not doing my November recap, I felt sad. My future self loves these. They make the chaos of my life a wee bit tidier. A monthly reflection helps me remember, which matters deeply because my grandma had Alzheimer’s and didn’t know me anymore. Forgetting scares me. Writing is how I empower myself against that forgetting.

And public accountability, strangely, gives me just enough oomph of motivation to follow through on something that is at its core an internal promise to myself.

So: I’m still going to write these. Not for readers. For me. For the version of Jen reading this ten years from now.

Lastly, in case you didn’t know, last year I published a collection of my favorite letters called Letters to My Life. It’s favorite way to share my writing with you so you don’t have to look at a screen. Grab your copy here.

Now, let’s dive into letter 291 from a learn-it-all. Enjoy!

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❓Question to think about

What was interesting about November?

🖊️Writing

So without further ado, here are

10 rad things from November

1. Cozy last writing class in the basement of my teacher and students

2. Wrote letters and postcards to people I admire

3. Started writing my next book on a sprint on my eight hour plane ride from Amsterdam to Detroit. Sure it was only ~3000 words, but it’s better to start. And now the pot is stirring in my subconscious of what else to add. The purpose is to preserve the travels from my 14 months. I decided it might just be a book for me rather than anyone else. I want to let it rip without hedging about what I write.

4. Took Stephen King’s advice and have been typing at least 1000 words each day I open a computer which is roughly 4 days a week. (and no I have not used AI to go over it (yet) because i didn’t want it to rob the delight from myself remembering the things I already hold as important)

5. Went ice skating for the first time while holding the hand of an eleven year old. I love shared experiences of going from (1) fear of the slipperiness to (2) surprise of it not being as hard as I thought to (3) joy of the movement next to others on the rink to (4) sadness the time is over and it’s over

6. Had one of my favorite days which started off dismally bringing my bike on teh train at 9:03 (after rush hour) but actually smack dab in rush hour and it was snowing, I went to the municipality instead of the immigration office. Got my resident card, and things went up hill. Had my first in-person writing coaching meeting with a client. Then a community dinner, ice skating and got home at 1am. A 17 hour day but such a hoot.

7. A kitchen mate to exchange little moments throughout the day with

8. Seeing Lorde live the day before I left my solo traveling era of travel in Amsterdam. She is so unique and different and confident in her expression. It’s inspiring to witness. She sang Solar Power, and oldie and such a goodie that is my favorite song from her.

9. A chat with my cousin who’s a minister about God and religion at a tram stop after a tasty Surinamese dinner

10. Watching Shrek and laughing my heinie off

Ten lessons

1. my audiobook creation I shared here is going slower than planned with editing and adding music but still intending to get it out by the end of 2025!

2. Make sure windows are fully locked otherwise a gust will come and swing it open and shatter the pancake plant to the floor

3. when you’re heater is broken, even after bleeding the radiator, and you wear gloves while working on your computer, knowing the hotkeys is useful because the trackpad won’t recognize your gloved fingers. But at least your fingers aren’t icies anymore.

4. If you’re doing something that was originally a choice for fun, like ice skating or attending a football game or a turkey trot at the ass crack of the day, and there’s a lot of fear or anger or sadness popping up, reground thoughts of you and the group to remember you chose to do this thing for fun. And if you’re not feeling well be ready to cancel plans because it’s not worth days of being out of pocket.

5. It’s better to show up and get rejected by the potential job, housemate, friend, or fella than not show up at all.

6. Ask for the mailing address anyways. The awko taco is worth it. And Postable makes it easier.

7. Follow the surge of inspiration and send the message to the random person, even if it’s been decades. What do you actually have to lose?

8. Turn off the internet and then there is no Chat GPT in another tab tempting you to atrophy your brain.

9. Connection is more fresh when you assume they know nothing and pretend to be connecting for the first time, like what’s happening with my brother’s girlfriend.

10. Dogs are marvelous co-regulators. Especially Paisley and Polo.

❄️ For December, ten things I am excited about

1. Continuing the daily outreach that I started on October 20th for Tether project (thanks to the template of Carly Valancy)

2. Play dates with family members (Pentatonix concert last night with mom, Edsel Ford House today with dad)

3. Making short stories long (instead of long stories, short)

4. Chatting with more Internet friends to stir the pot of serendipity. Find a time here :)

5. My annual reflection and going over the reflections from my year of exploration

6. Listening to Bing Crosby, Mariah Carey and albums that Maggie Rogers wrote that she’s listening to (Ray of Light — Madonna, Third — Portishead, For The Roses — Joni Mitchell, Rhythm of the Saints — Paul Simon, Songs In A Minor — Alicia Keys)

7. Skimming through book notes of my favorite book notes

8. Buying a live Christmas tree for the first time in five years and knitting scarves

9. Skiing in oodles and poodles of snow

10. Staying healthy, hydrated, moisturized, layered, nourished, well-rested, and inspired

🎬 Watching

Devil Wears Prada.

My dad says I’m not allowed to watch this anymore because I know every line and need to get out into humanity more. The screen writer was so brilliant with this movie though.

I mean c’mon now, the sass of Miranda Presitly and Anne Hathaway as an underdog and the lines like “Everyone, gird your loins!”

“Everyone, gird your loins” is an idiom meaning to prepare for a difficult challenge, derived from a biblical phrase and popularized by the movie The Devil Wears Prada. It suggests preparing yourself mentally and physically for something strenuous or challenging. The original meaning came from the practice of tucking up loose robes to allow for free movement during work or battle.

• Meaning: To get ready for a difficult or demanding situation.

• Origin: The phrase comes from a biblical instruction (e.g., Jeremiah 1:17), which alludes to the physical act of tying up a long tunic (or “loincloth”) to prepare for work or battle.

• Modern usage: The phrase was made famous in popular culture by the movie The Devil Wears Prada, where it is used to signal an impending crisis or challenge.

🎧Listening

Unforgettable by Nat King Cole

Unforgettable that’s what you are
Unforgettable though near or far
Like a song of love that clings to me
How the thoughts of you goes things to me
Never before has someone been more

This song always reminds me of my mom’s parents. They were Polish so I called them Basia [Basha] and Dziadzia [Jaja]. I got chicken skin and cried a bit listening to it get sung live by the Pentatonix last night at Little Caesar’s Arena downtown.

🔍Word to define

ultracrepidarian | ˌəltrəkrepəˈderēən |

noun a person who expresses opinions on matters outside the scope of their knowledge or expertise:

Example: most patients are ultracrepidarians when it comes to medicine thanks to WebMD.

adjective expressing opinions on matters outside the scope of one’s knowledge or expertise

(This word is just too goofy not to share. I found it in the bio of Kyle van Oosterum)

🌟Quote to inspire

“As long as you live, keep learning how to live.” - Seneca

📸Photos of the Month

🙏Shoutouts

• to the Pathless Path call a couple hours ago that made me realize I do still in fact want to write this thing. Thank you Brian Wiesner, Chris James , Ved Shankar , and Iwana Johannsen. I still wrote this thing!

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If you made it this far, wow! I am grateful you chose to fill part of your day here.

If something in this letter resonated, press the ❤️ , leave a comment, reply to this email, or reach me at vermetJL@gmail.com. I love hearing from you.

Keep on learning 😁

Tot snel 🌺 🌺

Toodles :)

Jen

P.S. - in case you missed this month, I wrote:

1. 100 reasons to stay grateful

2. One Year Later

3. A little reminder to slow down

4. On impermanence, pride and petsitting