🪣 Dear baby Jen in a bucket

Reflections on Growth, Joy, and Self-Acceptance

Aloha fellow learn-it-all 👋

Greetings from Honolulu, Hawaii 🏝️

First off, here is some exciting news! :-)

Join me next Wednesday, July 17, at 3 pm EST in my one-hour workshop partnering with Foster Online Writing Community called "Penning Letters to Weave the Past, Present, and Future.”

We'll explore the power of letter writing to connect with our personal histories, embrace our current selves, and envision our futures. Through guided exercises and reflections, discover how this timeless practice can create confidence, enhance self-awareness, and foster growth. You can register for free here.

Secondly, the letter I share today is one of the first letters I feel confident about publishing for my month of July Book Writing Challenge. This writing project is constantly in progress, so I would love to hear from you about what resonates in this letter.

Now, let’s dive into letter 218 from a learn-it-all. Enjoy!

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If you are reading this for the first time, I’d love you to sign up below to join the other learn-it-alls:

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🖊️Writing

Dear baby Jen in a bucket,

Life’s so much grander than that of the brown bucket you float in.

~28-month-old baby Jen floating in a bucket outside Ann Arbor, Michigan (Summer 1998)

The saying goes, “Sink or swim,” but what about floating along and following the fun?

You remind me of how we are the boundless possibility of wonder, joy, and curiosity.

Maybe we’ve been okay as we are all along and didn’t need to fix or improve. Maybe we’ve already been enough?

Since I was you, it’s been 26 years and counting. I could never have imagined the trajectory we have journeyed and the life I live today. It feels miraculous that somehow little ol’ you—a small-town Midwest babe—landed where I am today.

Who would've thought I created this beautiful life in Hawaii after three years on this little speck of remote land floating in the largest ocean spinning on this blue and green dot in outer space?

What I want you to know is I am proud of our growth.

From moving across the globe to an island and embracing new cultures, I am adaptable.

From finance to creative projects, I am hard working.

From nearly drowning at the swim tests in Lake St. Clair to swimming miles in the Pacific Ocean, I am courageous.

From biking to the pool, to canals in Amsterdam, to cycling up volcanoes, I am driven.

From sprinting to completing triathlons, I am athletic.

From tying different different knots on boats to exploring new hobbies like surfing, ukulele, and film photography, I am curious.

From catechism to evening grace and Zen sesshin, I am spiritual.

From designing my own Dutch thematic sequence to my banana bread recipe, I am inventive.

From fearing my lack of originality in art class to creating daily, I am creative.

From the shame with my dyslexia to maintaining a daily journaling practice, I am devoted.

From being bullied to having many deep and dear friends, I am connected.

From writing alone to being in a community and feeling like I belong, I am expressive.

From the deep desire to fit in to feeling peace in my body, the confidence I wear, and the gray colors in my hair, I am accepted.

Today, I feel seen as I am rather than as who I’ve been conditioned to be. You, 28-month-old Jen, remind me of this.

Thoughts don’t tiptoe into your head of not being good enough. The world has not gotten to you with programming and planting fears of what you cannot do. I love how you stay open without judging what is good or bad.

I see a glisten of wonder in your eyes and naive purity on the bridge of your nose, still without freckles.

I love how full of wonder you are.

You smile and invite others to smile, too.

You exude joy because you can, making you feel most alive.

That innocent mind is curious and believes she’s capable of anything.

You inspire me not to lose that part of myself. I love you, younger self. I commit to preserving these qualities of joy, curiosity, and wonder you embody.

Thank you for reminding me of who I want to be today. I see much hope for who we can become in the future together, floating along in this beautiful life.

I love you lil baby Jen in a bucket.

With much love, 💕

Your present 28-year-old self

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❓Question to think about

What would you write to your younger self in a letter?

📜🖋 Poetry Corner

It’s groovy to see life go by,
with all the clouds in the sky,
and even to watch the flowers float and die.

🎧Listening

Float On by Modest Mouse

Even if things get heavy, we'll all float on (while living here)

Alright, already, we'll all float on (alright!) (float on)

Now don't you worry, we'll all float on (alright!)

We'll all float on

🎬 Watching

I watched a childhood favorite called Ice Princess.

This movie is about chasing dreams after realizing you weren’t going after your own. When you feel most alive, you’ll know what to pursue.

I want this more than I've ever wanted anything. I said no to Harvard. I will work harder than any skater you have ever trained. And if I fail, I fail, but because I wasn't good enough, not because I didn't have the guts. — Casey Carlyle

🔍Word to define

Float: (vb) rest or move on or near the surface of a liquid without sinking

🌟Quote to inspire

“To have faith is to trust yourself to the water. When you swim you don’t grab hold of the water, because if you do you will sink and drown. Instead you relax, and float.”

— Alan Watts

📸Photo of the Week

Over the weekend, I swam with a bunch of pods of 20-plus dolphins to cool down after competing in a 1.6-mile swim race. That was a highlight.

I also connected more with my ohana through walking, dancing, stargazing, and eating. It was so nice to be in their company, enjoy each other’s company, and cheer each other on. Thank you to all my admirers of my sand angel artwork.

🙏Shoutouts

• To all who have encouraged me to share this letter, including but not limited to Hannah Broderick, Steffen Kelly, Alex Liebscher, and Simoun Redoblado

• To Emily Rose for visiting me all the way from Manhattan. I am so grateful to have a lifelong friend like you <3

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I appreciate you reading this!

If ideas resonated, I’d love you to press the heart button, leave a comment, reply to this email, or reach me at vermetjl@gmail.com. If you forgot who I am, I welcome you to my online home.

Keep on learning 😁

Mahalo 🌺

Jen

PS - in case you missed last week, I shared my June month reflection 💭 The Joys of June with Daily Ocean Dips & Daydreams

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